1. Read more stuff from my website
2. Shamelessly plug your work/art during a time of crisis.
3. Feel slightly guilty.
4. Brush that guilt off and return to a ceaseless, although fruitless, attempt to find a way to get out of student loan debt.
5. Stare at the total amount of your student loan debt.
6. Cry
7. Shake that off.
8. Write a philosophical treatise based on Phyllis Lapin from The Office
9. wEadiubgdsu
10. Have your cat walk across your keyboard while typing.
11. Get jealous of the leisurely lifestyle of your cat.
12. Enjoy some nature.
13. Ew. A bug touched me.
14. Run back inside.
15. Clean the baseboards in your house.
16. Get back pain from cleaning baseboards.
17. Try some yoga to alleviate back pain.
18. Be savagely attacked by your pets who think this is playtime.
19. Make your bed.
20. No, get in bed.
21. Make your bed and then get into your bed.
22. Why do we make our bed when we just screw it up every night?
23. Wait.
24. Why do we do the same things every day?
25. Wash your hands.
26. You know what? Make the damn bed.
27. Wash your hands.
28. Realize sequels are never as good as the original.
29. Continue to pursue a sequel because familiarity is comforting to consumers.
30. That’s right. I’m here for your money.
31. Pretend you didn’t see #30.
32. Also, read more of my articles.
33. Invent a language.
34. Etoyr om yjsy amhishr.
35. Make an awful joke that no one will ever understand.
36. Panic.
37. Feel your inevitable doom slowly creeping in around you.
38. Tell it to piss off.
39. Dance.
40. F####R
41. DANCE!
42. He never had a chance!
43. If you are still reading. Send help.
44. Ignore #43 as well.
45. Seriously. Ignore #43.
46. Think positively.
47. Think negatively.
48. Bring balance to the force.
49. I don’t know. I really feel like this is a bit contrived at this point.
50. Please laugh?